a poem that did not exist 30 seconds ago

I have yet to write a poem
about you.
Most poems
or my poems
are about things I can't say
or shouldn't say
or won't say
or can only say at
this precise moment
when the light slants like that
or a glance from a stranger
driving past hits
the space between my
arm and shoulder
the weak point in my armor
and near breaks my heart.
But you
I tell you everything
and you are always here
except now
which is why I
finally write you this
poem.

Reading List

I decided I better commit to list of books and get a few people to hold me somewhat accountable, otherwise I will never read any of them.

1. Finish New Moon. I must come to terms with the fact that I will not realistically read anything else until I've finished giving this masterpiece (snort, chortle) a second read.
2. Beowulf on the Beach. About 3/4 of the way done, and in my opinion I've read all the interesting parts, but I hate leaving books unfinished.
3. The Road. Must finish before I can see the movie. This desire = great incentive.
4. Of Human Bondage. I need to read a real book.
5. Some other classics and recent purchases that I cannot recall at the moment because I'm away from my book shelf. Will update later.

Long term aspiration:
The Lord of the Rings trilogy. Re-watched ROTK recently, and a bunch of the extras, and my interest was reinvigorated.

If you guys have any suggestions (NOVELS! NOVELS!), please let me know.

"I hear a song from another time..."

Yesterday, I solved a twelve year old mystery. The summer of 1997, when I turned ten years old, I spent a month or so in the hospital. While I was there, I heard two songs almost every day. It wasn't until over two years later that I discovered that one of them was Third Eye Blind's "Semi-Charmed Life." And it wasn't until YESTERDAY that I finally, finally learned what the second one was. I was hanging out with my friend Jordan and for some reason we started compiling a list of the best 90's pop songs. He mentioned a song called "Sunny Came Home", by Shawn Covill, and it didn't sound familiar. He pulled it up on YouTube and it still didn't sound familiar, until it got to the chorus, especially the part "She says days go by...I close my eyes and fly out of my mind into the fire" The only line I could ever remember from the entire song was "She says days go by," only all this time I had thought it was "As days go by," which is why I could never find it when I searched. This maybe doesn't seem like a big deal to you guys but to me it was HUGE. I have literally been wondering about this song since I was 9 years old and I am now 22. I had begun to think there was no such song.

Anyways...I also rediscovered the song "1979" by Smashing Pumpkins, which I think you would both recognize if you listened to it.

Here's links to them both if you guys care to listen:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0nKrD5If7U
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wrivjzw0RlI

The Other World Files

I should've started something like this long ago, but finally got around to it last week. Often times, I wake up from a night's sleep having had a whole series of interesting dreams. Usually, I can't remember everything well enough for it to be a cohesive story, and often times, what happened seems a lot cooler when I first wake up than when I tell it out loud to someone a couple of hours later. But usually, some piece or detail stands out, and I'll find myself thinking "That would be a cool part of a story." So I decided to start keeping track of these interesting bits so I have something to pull from when I write. Below are two silly little things from a couple of nights ago:

-There is a tiny little boy. He has a very large, heavy, head, and such a small torso that his giant head seems to be sitting upon two rather small and inadequate legs. Attached are two rather skinny and inadequate arms. He is like those childhood toys – the ones that have a heavy weight in the bottom, so no matter how many times you throw them or knock them over they always glide back to an upright position – except the opposite. His head is so heavy that he is constantly tipping over, especially when he gets running too fast. When he falls over (usually onto his back), he must used his two small inadequate arms to pull his head up so he can stand, much like someone doing a stomach curl. His name is Theodore. For some reason, there is a plainly pretty, blonde woman who pretends to be his mom but is not. No one but me really knows she is not his mother.

-A message that says, “Sorry, but you are looking for something that isn’t there.”

F&H again

So my prediction turned out to be true - I spent the majority of my day re-reading Fire and Hemlock instead of studying for the GRE. In fact, I didn't leave the house at all except to go for a long walk by the cornfields across from my house. It reminds me of the first time I ever read it, I think it was during sophomore year in high school. I started it on the last day of Christmas Break and stayed up all night long, reading under the covers. I woke up to find that, lo and behold, it was a snow day! The whole thing seemed magical and fantastical and right out of the book.

Today reading it somehow made me feel like I was fifteen again. I have not felt this much like myself in a long time. Something about the combination of doing math (something I also haven't really done since high school) and reading a dear old book took me back in time. I cannot wait to make this book into a movie sometime.

Other favorite young adult fiction books I will make into movies:

Howl's Moving Castle (live-action version)
The Ordinary Princess
The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle
The Witch of Blackbird Pond
The Perilous Gard
The Sherwood Ring
Calico Captive

Fire and Hemlock all over again

Today I did the worst thing I could possibly do two days before taking the GRE...started a book I knew I couldn't put down. Yes, I'm re-reading Fire and Hemlock, the fantanstical masterpiece by Diana Wynne Jones. Amy, READ IT if you haven't. I'm only about 70 pages into it which means it will be a long time before I begin to study. To bad I still have to learn 500 words and oh, HOW TO DO MATH.

First Post

I wish I had something creative to report on, but unfortunately I've been in a bit of a funk lately. My boyfriend did buy me a book yesterday, "Of Human Bondage," by *Somerset Maugham*, that looks quite good. The only other thing I've read by him is "The Painted Veil," which I very much enjoyed. However, as good as it looks, I doubt I will get around to reading it anytime soon. The only place I have any privacy is in my room, and my room is so small that to be in it, I have to be in bed. Once I'm there, it's only a matter of time before I fall asleep. I have a lot of books started that I really need to finish. "The Road," by Cormac McCarthy, for starters, before I see the movie which comes out on Nov. 25th. I also need to finish "Snark," a non-fiction book by the New Yorker film critic David Denby. It's about the low level that journalism has sunk to, especially political journalism, and for the most part it's pretty funny. I just haven't been in the mood. Sometime I think that no matter how old I get, my favorite books will still be young adult fiction.

Let's see....creative things I've done lately....I did go to a Writing Workshop at the Key yesterday and we practiced writing to music. It was fun but it's difficult not to write self-consciously when you know you are immediately going to share it with people. I sewed a patch on my friends shirt, which made me realize how much I like to sew, but it wasn't exactly a creative endeavor. I AM going to watch a movie tonight after I get done babysitting, but I haven't decided what yet.

As for writing, I feel like I constantly have stories floating around in my head, but the thought of actually sitting down to write them is so daunting. Also, I am HORRIBLE at thinking up plot, and HORRIBLE and writing main characters that aren't myself.

Well, that might be all for now. I think I'll post some of my tidbits form Writing Workshop just because it's all I have.